The Super Bowl and Super Bowl commercials
Feb 8th 2016, 14:00, by Ken Levine
Super Bowl 50 is history. During the game I decided to live tweet. This is the kind of crap I write on Twitter. You're welcome to follow me. Here are my most liked and re-tweeted tweets. Most are about the commercials because, well… the game pretty much sucked (unless you were a Broncos fan, and even then). Some of these will make no sense if you weren't watching the game. In those cases please just assume they were amusing. Trending: I hate Joe Buck -- even though he's not doing the game and the game hasn't even started. If the Super Bowl were on Fox, Seth MacFarlane would be singing America the Beautiful. Nantz: Temperature 76 BUT there are breezes. I hate Joe Buck. A white guy singing the Jefferson's Theme? I'm boycotting the Oscars. New drinking game: commercials with bears. Must there be an animal in every commercial? No commercial for CONCUSSION so far. Finally! A talking razor! Mortgage by phone -- see THE BIG SHORT at a theater near you. Amy Schumer stole her material from Spuds McKenzie. Best part of the super bowl -- pitchers and catchers report in about a week. This is where you ask "what would Pete Carroll do?" Is there ever NECESSARY roughness? That's a hospital with all beautiful people. CODE BLACK. For when the Kardashians need an ER. During half-time, which was billed as celebrating the old, now, and future. Since the game is on CBS I'm surprised Julie Chen isn't part of the halftime panel. It's not the Orange Bowl halftime show but it's getting there. They just need floats. Love Bruno Mars. He can do anything. Sing in a gold suit. Sing in a black suit. I'd let Bruno receive kickoffs. He can bust some moves. There's the old. Music acts for the CBS audience. They should re-show the Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction. Alec Baldwin is the next William Shatner. LOVED the halftime show. I feel guilty I'm drinking a Coke. More pie charts! When Graham Gano missed a key field goal: Hook 'em Gano. So I'm eating Doritos, watching the commercial and thinking, "Am I eating dog food?" Death Wish coffee and diarrhea medicine within two commercial breaks. Bring back the Bud Bowl. El Nino just caused another turnover. Two more commercials with cute animals. I hate Joe Buck. Highlight of the third quarter: singing sheep. The sheep sang better than the super bowl babies. I'm more upset that this is the last year for THE GOOD WIFE than Peyton Manning. My vote for MVP: that spastic colon character in the diarrhea commercial. A thrilling finish could lift this super bowl all the way up to mediocre. Hey, Carolina. According to Donald Trump, finishing second is as good as winning. So congratulations. Maybe Jim Nantz's newborn son Jamison will become a sportscaster so people can tweet "I hate Jamison Nantz." On to baseball! This was more fun than live tweeting DOWNTON ABBEY. Thanks for following! |